Leadership Solutions

Leadership: Ten Difficult Challenges

Are you challenged by these?

Each of these requires difficult decisions. Such as:

1) We're supposed to help others when they're in trouble, and we're not supposed to enable bad behavior.

2) We're supposed to alert others to possible solutions, and we're not supposed to give advice.

3) We're supposed to acknowledge our feelings, and we're not supposed to let our emotions control our actions.

4) We're supposed to be childlike, and we're not supposed to act childish.

5) We're supposed to be personable, and we're not supposed to take things personally.

6) We're supposed to give from abundance, and we're not supposed to ignore our needs.

7) We're supposed to show unconditional love, and we're not supposed to hide in denial.

8) We're supposed to work hard, and we're not supposed to work too hard.

9) We're supposed to follow a systematic process, and we're not supposed to inhibit spontaneity.

10) We're supposed to stand for what we believe, and we're not supposed to let rigid thinking prevent discovering new ideas.

So, what about you? What contrasting situations can you offer? What challenges have you found?

Key Point: Good leadership is the art of making wise choices.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Author, Speaker, IAF Certified Professional Facilitator

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Leadership: Happy Thanksgiving

Hello Everyone,

Happy Thanksgiving.

Best wishes for today and the holidays,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Author, Speaker, IAF Certified Professional Facilitator

Web Site

Leadership: One More Day

Certainly, anticipation has been building.

Now here we are, one day away from the great food festival, known as Thanksgiving.

Here are five friendly suggestions to help make the day something to be grateful for.

1) Keep it simple.

Rather than cook 47 different courses, prepare a reasonable number of choices. If you already bought six tons of food, put the extra things in the freezer. Rather than attend a dozen parties, go to one or three. And so on.

2) Keep it real.

Eat, drink, and party in moderation. Remember that you have to wake up the next day, and you want to feel like it's worth being alive when you do.

3) Keep it personal.

Other people matter. So be a gracious host, even if you visit. Talk about good news, things that work, and achievements. Thus, avoid complaints and negative topics. Be friendly, be gracious, be kind.

4) Keep it loose.

Decide to enjoy yourself. Relax. And set boundaries. Excuse yourself from negative conversations. Detach from other people's mistakes and problems. They worked hard to create them and thus they own them.

5) Keep it funny.

Find the humor in everything. Smile. Laugh. Giggle. For some people this will be a new experience. So, take a risk and try it. You'll be amazed by how good it feels.

Key Point: It's supposed to be a holiday. So enjoy it. And help others enjoy it too.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Author, Speaker, IAF Certified Professional Facilitator

www.stevekaye.com Web Site

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Leadership: Other Side of Gratitude

It's possible that someone read yesterday's blog and thought,

"Hey, I have too many problems to spend time being grateful."

Really?

Those problems might be your greatest gift.

Here's how:

1) Problems challenge your creativity.

They force you to seek improvements, learn new skills, and invent strategies. They also test your resolve. And sometimes they serve as warnings about impossible projects that need to be abandoned.

2) Difficult people challenge your maturity.

They test your ability to be kind when under stress. They teach you better ways to communicate and get along. They cause you to avoid doing things that make others become difficult (i.e., retaliate). And they provide examples of what NOT to do.

So take a deep breath and bask in the warm comfort of being grateful.

Then stand up and shout, "I'm grateful for everything and everyone who has made me miserable!"

There. Does that feel better?

Key Point: Our challenges are actually gifts that we need to open.

Bonus Idea: Make sure that you're working in ways that make others feel grateful for the right reasons.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Author, Speaker, IAF Certified Professional Facilitator

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Leadership: Thanksgiving Project

Here is something that you can go for yourself.

Take a moment to reflect on everything that you're grateful for.

If possible, I encourage you to write out a list.

Include the things that make your life comfortable, the people who help you, and the activities that reward you.

Use this list as the basis for your thoughts during the days going into Thanksgiving.

You may find that it makes life more enjoyable.

In fact, you might find this to be so worthwhile, that you'll continue doing it all year.

Key Point: We are all fortunate in many ways. Find them and be grateful.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Author, Speaker, IAF Certified Professional Facilitator

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Leadership: What Will You Talk About?

Are you prepared for this?

In just a few days, most of you will gather for a Thanksgiving dinner with relatives whom you have not seen since last year.

It's an opportunity to celebrate each other's good news, enjoy good conversation, and feel connected with your family. At least that's the promise we hope for.

Here's how to make sure that you're contributing to everyone's merriment.

1) Focus on them.

Ask questions. Listen to their stories and news. Show interest in what they have to say. Acknowledge their achievements. Let them be them be the star in your conversations.

2) Be positive.

Avoid giving advice because no one wants it. Avoid criticizing because no one needs it. Avoid bragging because no one cares.

3) Detach.

Let others be right, which means accept what they say. If you must, respond with gentle questions, such as, "How would that work?" or "Where did you hear that?" Accept that their world is their business.

4) Be neutral.

Recognize that no one came to the party to be saved, converted, or fixed. So, leave your private cause at home. Take off commemorative pins and buttons because these invite counter ideas.

5) Be smart.

Remove odd jewelry, cover tattoos, and wear conventional clothes. Yes, we need to be true to ourselves. And if you are meeting with relatives who dislike these things, do everyone a favor and leave them at home.

6) Be kind.

It's possible that some of your relatives will miss reading this article. So, they'll wear something that you consider to be disgusting. In that case, ignore it. Avoid critical comments, trick questions, and veiled insults.

Key Point: Be part of the memories that others want to keep.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Author, Speaker, IAF Certified Professional Facilitator

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Leadership: World Record

You may not have heard of Esther Johnson.

But she's famous in the World Flying Disc Federation.

She holds the world record for throwing a flying disc in her age group.

She threw a disc 8.08 meters, which is just a little more than 26.5 feet. 

Wait, before you laugh, her age group is women, age 102 and older. Her name appears near the top of the list.

Now, are you impressed?

I am.

Admittedly, there's not much competition in this age group.

So her achievement is more a matter of showing up (or being there) than anything else.

So what are your plans for age 102?

Do you plan to show up?

In fact, do you show up now, regardless of your age group?

Do you show up at work, giving your most creative ideas? Do you show up in your relationships, giving your most respectful self? Do you show up in your life, giving your most courageous effort?

Every success begins with just that: showing up. After that, the rest is easy.

Key Point: Show up. Then do something.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Author, Speaker, IAF Certified Professional Facilitator

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Leadership: Gifts for the Holidays

Maybe you've already begun training for this.

For example, you may have been jogging through the neighborhood, lifting weights, and practicing martial arts. You may also have bought body armor, knee pads, and a helmet.

You'll need all of this if you plan to participate in the Black Friday Stampede.

Recall in past years, hoards of grunting shoppers have trampled each other in frantic attempts to save a few bucks.

Of course, there are safer (and better) ways to celebrate the spirit of the holidays.

When possible, you might:

1) Shop from local merchants.

You'll find unique products. And you'll meet people who truly care about customers.

Recognize that these small business owners have invested a lifetime of effort and hope into their stores. You can support them and the American dream by buying from them.

2) Buy Fair Trade products.

This means that everyone in the supply chain was paid a fair wage (i.e., the type of wage you would want to be paid).

When you buy fair trade products, you'll do more than support something worthwhile. You also take a stand against the exploitation that must occur in order to sell goods at absurdly low prices.

Key Point: Let the generosity of your holiday shopping include the people who made the products.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Author, Speaker, IAF Certified Professional Facilitator

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Leadership: How to End a Conversation

We're eating breakfast at a professional meeting.

And he asked me what I do.

So I told him that I was a professional meeting facilitator.

And he asked, "What is the biggest mistake people make in meetings?"

So I said, "They call a meeting expecting that people from different parts of an organization will come together with a common understanding of a goal that no one thought of."

And he said, "Is that a problem?"

And before I could say, "yes" he turned away to talk with the person on his right.

End of conversation.

Hey! I wish it were otherwise.

Really.

I wish we could obtain results without knowing what they are.

I also wish we could wake up with a million dollars under our pillow. Or a basket full of gold eggs on our doorstep. Or a stocking filled with Apple stock options hanging from our mantle.

But in the meantime, if you work for a real business in the real world you'll have to set a real goal for your meetings.

Of course, setting a goal may seem like a daunting task.

So call me. I'll show you how to make it easy.

Then you'll have something to talk about the next time we meet.

Key Point: A meeting without a goal is a journey without a destination.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300
 

PS: My workshop on Effective Meetings makes a nice holiday gift. Buy one for your department.
 

Author, Speaker, IAF Certified Professional Facilitator

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Leadership: Amazing Miracles

Here it is: Now anyone one can learn how to write in just 60 minutes!

Guaranteed.

Of course, there is a catch. You have to write for 60 minutes every day for thirty years. By the end of this time you will be an accomplished writer.

There's an important point here.

We live in a get rich quick society. Everyone wants success in 60 minutes. Some even want it in half an hour. But unlike TV, real life lacks fast success as well as background music and commercial breaks.

Instead, real success comes slowly after investing in a lifetime of good decisions. For example:

1) People become popular by investing in a lifetime of respectful conversations. Then they have friends who respect them.

2) People become wealthy by investing in a lifetime of working at a job, saving money, and being frugal. Then they have savings that provide security in retirement.

3) People become wise by investing in a lifetime of introspection, reading, and learning. Then they have wisdom that leads to good decisions.

Notice the pattern here.

Every worthy achievement comes from making small investments over long time.

And once you reach that achievement, people will think it was a miracle.

Key Point: Small investments made consistently over a lifetime become huge achievements.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Author, Speaker, IAF Certified Professional Facilitator

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