Leadership Solutions

Leadership Solutions: A Thousand Meetings

A thousand meetings is a lot of meetings.

So this really surprised me.

I just estimated that I have attended over a thousand professional meetings over the past thirty-plus years. That includes association meetings, networking meetings, and skill development meetings.

And this does not include the meetings, conferences, or workshops where I was the speaker.

Since I go to these meetings to gain ideas, I have developed a special note taking system.

It is:

On a primary level, I write notes on new ideas. This serves as a summary of the speaker's presentation. And it usually amounts to about a fourth of the notes that I take.

On a deeper level, I write notes on ideas that occur as a result of the speaker's presentation. This can include action goals, article outlines, and next steps. These notes represent the real benefit from the presentation.

This leads to an interesting observation: some poor presentations have proven to be more beneficial than some outstanding ones.

Why?

Because the bad ones really made me think. They contained errors to avoid. They challenged me with boredom. They revealed human dynamics by offending the audience.

Of course, this is not an encouragement to deliver unrehearsed presentations of trivial ideas.

Instead it's an example of taking responsibility to find something good anywhere.

Key Point #1: Your job as a speaker is to make people think. And they'll remember you if you make them think about something you said.

Key Point #2: Every event contains something useful. Seek it out.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

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Leadership Solutions: Team Wins, Fans Lose

Now that the confetti has been swept up and everyone has gone home, we can talk about the NBA playoffs.

First, the Celtics played a better game. And they deserve to be congratulated for their skill on the court.

And yet, their fans lost.

How?

After the game, Celtics fans pounded on the bus that took the Lakers players to the airport. They even cursed at them and shouted obscenities.

This is an outright shame.

Those men on the Lakers team are human beings. They don't deserve to be terrorized.

In fact, imagine what might have happened to them if they had won the championship.

(Yes, I realize that only a few nutty fans pounded on the bus. I still think it's tragic that anyone did it.)

We need to take a lesson from this.

Our behavior in victory (and in defeat) tells a lot about us.

And we need to demonstrate respect and maturity in both situations.

Key Point: The real test of your values often occurs just after the contest.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

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Leadership Solutions: Toxic Friends

Many books tell about how to deal with toxic people.

These, by the way, are the people who hurt you with shame, guilt, and pain. They set you up for failure. They cause you to make mistakes. They punish, scream, and become angry.

Usually, the authors suggest avoiding them. This makes sense because it's easier than trying to change them. And it's more honest than learning how to cope.

These books omit a special group of toxic people who also cause damage: people who seem to be friends.

For example, the person who always agrees with your complaints may be misleading you into avoiding responsibility.

For example, the person who always helps when you get in trouble may be preventing you from dealing with problems.

For example, the person who always likes everything that you do may be keeping you from becoming better.

Of course, we all need friends who agree, help, and like us. Sometimes this carries us through difficult times.

And yet if we begin to depend upon this type of assistance we may be missing important opportunities for personal growth.

Key Point: Be careful with the value of help that keeps you small.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Helping leaders find solutions

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Leadership Solutions: Real Gratitude

If you belong to an association that bestows awards, you must have watched a ceremony where people were honored for their contributions or achievements.

Most people say nice things after receiving the award.

And occasionally, someone brags about working harder than anyone else or complains about not receiving the award sooner.

I've seen this happen with about a fifth of the awards presented. And that's too often.

When this happens, I want to go up to the stage and tell the recipient, "Excuse me, we made a mistake. We're giving the award to someone else."

So, here is a friendly reminder to act like someone who deserves an award when you receive one.

And here's a tip: If you suspect that you might be honored with an award, write out a brief (positive) acceptance speech. Then show that speech to a few trusted colleagues. Collect their comments and make adjustments as needed. And finally, rehearse the speech so you can say it naturally.

After all, you want the members of the association to agree with the committee that chose you.

Key Point: Champions excel at being grateful.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Helping leaders find solutions

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Leadership Solutions: Essential Ingredient

It's free and it's priceless.

It's silence.

Why?

During silence you can:

1) Rest.

You can turn off your radar. You can stop hearing. You can sleep the way that you were meant to sleep.

2) Think.

You can go deep inside your mind. You can focus. You can evaluate options, imagine possibilities, and invent solutions.

3) Heal.

You can release stress. You can repair your senses. You can recover from the damage done by noise.

Find silence every day. Either close your door, turn off the TV, or pull out the ear buds.

And then let the silence come inside you.

Key Point: We need to include silence in the daily diet of our experiences.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Helping leaders find solutions

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Leadership Solutions: Amazing Suggestion

There it is, printed on the bill from the California Department of Motor Vehicles:

It's an encouragement to Mail the Payment, instead of deliver it to a DMV office.

And this makes me wonder why they would spend the cost of ink to tell people this.

That is, why would anybody want to drive to a DMV office to pay their bill?

For most people this works out to driving a round trip of about twenty miles. Then they have to wait in line, usually for an hour.

All totaled, if you include the pack-up-to-leave time, driving time, parking time, waiting time, and driving-home time, this experience costs them at least two hours.

And yet people choose to pay in person instead of simply mailing their payment. You know, the cost of a stamp is less than the cost of the gas required to take your car for a drive around the block.

I suppose that we have become accustomed to using our cars for everything.

So, here is a radically new strategy that will improve your life: avoid using your car.

Instead, walk. Or ride a bike. You'll gain exercise and fresh air.

And if you take public transportation, you'll gain time to read.

In turn, you'll save money on gas and you'll reduce pollution.

Of course, if you must sit in your car, you can still do that. Just leave the engine turned off.

Key Point: A car is one option, not the only option for travel.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Helping leaders find solutions

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Leadership Solutions: Something Different

Maybe you noticed something special about the Olympics.

All of the athletes receive applause from everyone. Then all of the athletes say nice things about the other athletes. And afterwards everyone goes home peacefully.

That is, unlike in commercial sports, no one boos the winners. No one attacks the losers.

And there are no TV cartoons of exploding helmets, warring robots, or hostile fireworks.

And no one goes on a rampage in town. No one pours ice water on a coach. No one squirts champagne all over a locker room.

Since this is the Olympics, everyone behaves like a mature, respectful adult. So, you can feel proud of any of them.

As a result, the Olympics represent true sport played in the spirit of demonstrating excellence.

I think we need to apply this to all sports.

Key Point: Sports reflect the values of a society. And it is the responsibility of leaders to insist that our sports focus on the achievement of excellence.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Helping leaders find solutions

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Leadership Solutions: Some Good News

Here are two comments from my presentation last week:

"I learned more about successful, productive meetings in one hour than I have in all my years in business." –HR Manager

"Steve's presentation on effective meetings was the most excellent session (informative and practical) that I have ever attended." –Director

Of course, if I speak at one of your events, your results may vary.

And here's an important point: I save comments like this in a database. That way, I can find them easily and organize them for marketing materials.

So, how about you?

Do you actively request, collect, and save compliments?

These become valuable data when preparing for performance reviews, writing resumes, or marketing your products (or services).

Key Point: Keep a record of the good news that you earn. It's an investment in your future.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Helping leaders find solutions

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Leadership Solutions: Today's Pop Quiz

Quick, tell me: Why do you work?

Hint: The wrong answer is "money."

Sure, everyone works to earn money so that they can pay bills, buy things, accumulate savings, and so on.

But if money is your prime focus, you are missing something important. And most likely you are performing below your potential.

So, what are better answers?

Hint: Almost anything else.

Why?

Consider this: What if you were working to do something like: Make the world safer, provide affordable healthcare, educate the next generation, and so on?

Would that get you up in the morning?

Key point: Give yourself a purpose worthy of greatness.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Helping leaders find solutions

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Leadership Solutions: Your Real Topic

Last week I spoke at a breakfast meeting in Pasadena.

Before my presentation I did the following:

1) Woke at 4:45 AM

2) Drove an hour

3) Ate a food bar and a banana for breakfast

4) Spent ten minutes searching for the meeting room

5) Moved furniture to provide a comfortable setting

So, what did I speak about?

How to hold Effective Meetings.

And I never mentioned freeway traffic, maps, or furniture.

Why?

Because I went to that meeting to talk about them (the audience) and how they could be more effective leaders.

I did not go to talk about me.

Key Point: Every presentation is about them. Make that the focus of every presentation.

Much success,

Steve Kaye

714-528-1300

Helping leaders find solutions

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